Special offers on my books!
All my Engaging NLP books are for sale on this site for £4.99 plus P&P which is £2 less than the recommended retail price and less than the price on Amazon CLICK HERE to take a look.
I wrote these after writing Teach Yourself : Be a happier parent with NLP because I felt there was a need for more of a workbook style of NLP book aimed at specific needs
Parents
Children
Teachers
Teenagers
New Mums
Back to Work
They are all quick reads for busy people who want to know how they can use NLP in their lives to tackle the sort of issues they have. The books are illustrated and offer helpful exercises you can do using the NLP techniques. Each exercise gives instructions and space to write down your thoughts.
The children’s book NLP for children is for you and your child to work through together. The ideal age for this is for a child aged about 4-11yrs and obviously a child aged 9-11yr can read and use the book on their own.
The teenage book is written for them to use to address issues they have around school or Uni, work, getting a job, peer group pressure, relationships and so on.
The Back to Work book is perfect for mums thinking about whether to go back to work or not or consider other options such as working freelance, starting their own business or taking on activities which may in time become businesses.
New Mums covers everything connected with pregnancy, childbirth and those early months giving you ways to manage tiredness, stress and the roller coaster of emotions we get at this time. I remember it well!
They are called Engaging NLP because they are workbooks and I want you to engage with them, use them and learn from them in a way I don’t feel existing NLP books can be used. Indeed the Teach Yourself book packed full as it is with everything you could possibly encounter as a parent, is a solid read and not a workbook despite it having exercises in it.
As well as being a mum of 4 children (now aged 11, 19, 22 and 23) and a former teacher, I am a Master Practitioner in NLP and a Trainer. I run workshops and offer NLP coaching on a one to one basis either face to face or via SKYPE or phone but I believe that by reading my books you will find the help you are looking for. If you still need some support please call me (01628 660618 or 00 44 1628 660618) or email me (judy@nlpkids.com) or contact me via the contact form because the reason I write the books and work with children and teenagers (and their parents) is because I care and I want to empower you to be happier parents and for your children to have the skills at their fingertips to be happier children.
NLP has long been used in the workplace but I feel that it is an essential parenting tool because being a parent is, I believe, the most important role we have in life. What we do and say, how we behave and the beliefs we pass on to our children make an enormous impact. They are constantly changing as are we as we learn and experience new things. These books are there for you , to help you in this important role. If I can help you further just get in touch. I don’t charge for a quick phone call or email you know!
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NLP apps for your phone!
I now have an app on the market with a daily tip (NLP inspired of course). Whether you are already familiar with NLP or just curious, these tips will give you something to think about. They are not just designed for parents or for you as a parent but are personal (I don’t mean X -rated!) and will resonate with you whatever you do or are in life.
I enjoyed writing them and even now, familiar as I am with NLP, I check my app every day and look at the thought. They still connect with me because they are about who we are and that is constantly changing as we meet new people and have new experiences.
I would be enormously grateful if you would post a review of the app and share it with your friends on Twitter or Linked In, Facebook etc
Here is the Android link – Click HERE
Here is the Iphone/Ipad/Ipod link – Click HERE
The Windows 7 one is on the way!
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Are you feeling overwhelmed?
It is not unusual, especially for mums, to feel overwhelmed by the ceaseless juggling that is motherhood whether you work or not. Whether we use the metaphor of the juggler or the plate spinner we should be aware that both these are skills so difficult that people train hard and others are impressed when they witness the skill at a circus.
Let me tell you something you may not know about juggling. In order to successfully learn to juggle you have to learn how to drop a ball (or an apple!) I know this because this is what I found the hardest part of the skill. As a busy mum I found it impossible to deliberately drop something in order to complete the larger task of juggling.
This metaphor is relevant to our lives in that if you too want to successfully juggle you must drop something deliberately because you want to drop it and because you know in your heart that by doing that, you will succeed in the bigger picture of what you want to achieve.
But what will you drop?
Everything seems important when you feel overwhelmed doesn’t it?
How can you just ‘not do’ something?
People rely on you.
Your kids rely on you.
Your husband relies on you.
Your mum relies on you.
Your boss relies on you.
But hang on……………if you were ill what would they do? Surely unless you put yourself, your health and wellbeing, happiness, rest and relaxation in top spot you will be in no position to be relied on by anyone.
Stand back now and consider all you do and have to do this week.
Which ball will you drop so you can successfully juggle?
Instead of listing everything you ‘should do’ ask yourself “What could I do?” Give yourself choices. So look again at what is currently overwhelming you and ask.
What can you do?
What can you delegate?
And what can you dump?
Now let that ball drop and you will be able to juggle.
If you would like a FREE short chat about how NLP could help you – call me on 01628 660618 or email me judy@nlpkids.com
Read MoreAre you using TOXIC words without realising it?
Be a happier parent with NLP
Neuro Linguistic Programming is the study of the way what we think (neuro) what we say (linguistic) and what we do (programming) affects the results we get in life; whether that be at work or at play. A core principle of NLP is:
If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.
What this means is that if you want a different result, a better one, then you need to change what you think, say and do. You cannot change your babies and toddlers but by making small changes yourself they will respond differently. So let’s take a look at some of the ways you can do this.
TOXIC WORDS
Don’t think about pink elephants!
What are you doing right now?
Yes you are thinking about pink elephants! You can’t help it. In order to process the instruction “don’t think about pink elephants” you have to think of a pink elephant so you know what it is you are not supposed to be doing.
This is what children do. When you say “Don’t fall!” or “Don’t drop that!” what happens?
It’s called an ‘embedded command’. You’ve put the idea into their head to fall or drop something. You didn’t do it deliberately. In fact what you actually meant was “Watch how you go” or “Be careful” and by changing what you say and using a positive embedded command you will get the desired result. Tell them what you Do want not what you DON’T want.
Your children are fighting and you say “Don’t hurt each other!” They hear “hurt each other” and carry on. Instead tell them what you do want them to do “Stop fighting!”
Think about it. All day long we use the ‘don’t’ word. “Don’t interrupt me when I’m on the phone”, “Don’t pull faces”, “Don’t annoy me”, “Don’t eat any more sweets”.
Tell them what you DO want.
Another toxic word is IF.
‘If’ implies they have a choice. They don’t. For example ‘If you eat your vegetables, you can have a pudding”, “If you go to bed nicely for me you can stay up another half an hour”, “If you are good you can have a sweet.” In these sorts of situations you aren’t offering them a choice. You want them to do what you’ve asked. Not doing it isn’t an option is it? So, use an embedded command here. Assume they will do what you’ve asked by saying instead “When you’ve eaten your vegetables you can have pudding” or “When you are good you can have a sweet.” You are giving them the benefit of the doubt and telling them what will happen when they’ve done what you asked.
How often do you use the word ‘try’?
Try implies that you won’t succeed, that you don’t expect them to succeed.
“Try and eat up your vegetables”, “Try and be good”, “Try and do what you’re told for once” I’m sure we all use the ‘try’ word with our toddlers. We use it with ourselves too, don’t we? Our inner voice tells us “Try and stay calm”, “Try not to lose your temper”. Delete the word ‘try’ and you get an instruction that is clear and unambiguous. They have no choice, they are simply to eat up their vegetables or be good. There is an expectation that they will be able to do that because you have assumed it in your instruction. It’s the same with your own inner self-talk.
Instead of just ‘trying’ – DO IT!
There is a lot more to NLP than a few toxic words and you can read how NLP will make you a happier parent by buying my book ‘Teach Yourself: Be a happier parent with NLP’ and the Engaging NLP series of workbooks for parents, teens, new mums, children, teachers and mums returning to work or setting up their own business. They are all available from http://www.nlpkids.co.uk or Amazon and other bookshops. Join the Facebook Group NLP Kids or ‘like’ the Engaging NLP Facebook page to share NLP parenting ideas with other mums. For Skype or telephone consultations call 00 44 1628 660618
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Mind the Gap! – Gain Rapport With Children
If you’ve travelled by tube you will know that at some stations they announce “Mind the Gap” to alert passengers to the space between the train and the platform edge lest they fall between them.
This is a great metaphor for what can happen in communication between you and your child. One of the pillars of NLP is that ‘the map is not the territory’; how your child sees and experiences the world is not the same as you.
Read MoreConfidence Building For Kids And Teens
How can we support our children and teenagers as they embark on this new stage in their lives?
At this time of year children are starting in new classes, new schools, preparing for important exams, embarking on a new life at Uni and leaving home. How can we help them to feel confident about these changes and prepare them to be resourceful even when we are not around?
Read MoreYou can find me here
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