Be A Happier Parent

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Be A Happier Parent with NLP is a detailed ‘Teach Yourself’ book which explains how you can improve your relationship with your child by using Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP). NLP is a coaching therapy that has been used in business to improve the communication and leadership skills of employees, and to build their self-esteem. These same skills can be taught to parents so that they can have a better rapport with their children, build confidence, support learning and maintain discipline.

Part I of the book explains the general principles of NLP, and also includes a questionnaire to determine how you and your child communicate and think. The first step to being a happier parent is to learn more about yourself, your values and what you want in life. Your upbringing may bring with it certain beliefs about how a parent should behave, but sometimes due to necessity or by choice we do things differently and, if we feel that we have not met other peoples expectations, we feel guilty. For example, working or not working. This book deals with the issues that mothers face, such as balancing home and work and time management.

I found the chapter on communicating very useful. NLP has lots of ideas for improving rapport, and this is what we need to communicate well. This can be done by using similar language, tone of voice or body language of the person you’re talking to. When speaking to children, we should think of the response we are trying to acheive. For example, if we want our children to do something, avoid the use of words like ‘should’ and use short sentences.

Part 2 of the book explains how to apply NLP in the home. This means learning how to be more confident, how to make our children more confident and better able to make friends and helping with schoolwork. NLP can also be used to deal with more specific problems to help children cope with change, such as changing schools, divorce or death.

One of the guiding principles of NLP is that everything is possible, we have all the skills we need to get a positive result. By learning some simple ‘tools’ we can change our behaviour and communication and have a better relationship with our children.

NLP may seem difficult to understand at first, but for the most part, the author uses everyday language. Another good thing about this book is that there are lots of exercises to help you practice what you have learnt, as well as tips, for example, how to change what you say to make your child do as he or she is told. This applies to teenagers as well, and there is a useful chapter on teenagers and their specific issues.